(no subject)
Things are genuinely lovely. I feel a balanced; life is wonderful.

Moving in 5 days!

That is all.

things that i've been up to post wedding/honeymoon
Between just being interested in different hobbies and not wanting to be home, I'm fairly busy most nights a week.  I don't really want to be home all that often since it's a complete disaster - if you can imagine home energy having sound that you can't not hear then imagine hearing a mid level droning all the time when you're there - then that's probably a really good reason why I'm out many nights a week.

Since June we've lived out of garbage bags to find our clothes and now there's boxes starting to be filled with our stuff.  We've thrown out all the cushions from the couch and large chair along with the bed frame.  The couch and chair are too heavy for us to bring down so they've been turn on their side to make room for boxes until the movers come to through them out...38 days from now.  The place is just uncomfortable to be in;I feel stressed every time I am home and I get snappy with Mason a lot faster than normal.  There's 38 days left before we move and it can't come soon enough.

Even if we lived in a really nice place coming home from your honeymoon you always feel that disillusionment.  Real life crashes upon you, no longer that lovely warm salty ocean water that you had been able to frolic in not 24 hours beforehand.  The honeymoon was amazing and I'll just leave it to that.

Currently I'm taking beginners' swim level 2 and really enjoying it.  Got a new pair of goggles and nose plugs and I'm able to tear through the water without choking too much and having a great time at it.  Mondays.

Thursdays - Adult concert band - bought a bassoon on mostly a whim (it's been a whim brewing in me for years but I've never made enough money to be able to buy one safely).  I have a great sound on the bassoon, but my fingering/staying in tune/getting out of being nervous (which all boils down to stamina...mostly) will be worked on.  Largely the members are 60+  and all very interesting individuals.  There's around 50 some members and they've had 3 previous practices before - I didn't do too badly considering I had to relearn the bass clef, relearn how to read music and relearn the bassoon (still working on it!) and only got the instrument a week beforehand.  The bass clarinetest I sat with is this older guy that sets up hiking adventures with other members of the band, super nice, he even walked me most of the way home.

I did miss the syngergy of the band - after a couple more practices I think we'll sound really tight.  It's good to be playing with people again.  Now for the stamina to come back!  We will be doing performances, but mostly at old age homes.  Not a lot of pressure there.

Saturdays - hooping.  Although I've yet to attend one of these I think it'll be fun when and if I do... ha!  Thank you Y membership.

Social times - not really able to do non-scheduled social times.  My number one priority at work is scheduling and this has really transfered into my real life as well.  I live by my calendar.  September is flying by and I just haven't had the time for a lot of social times, especially difficult social times where questioning the entire friendship needs to happen......... the wedding had so much drama and I kind of like not having to deal with it every day.....

We do need to send out thank you notes - which will happen.  I was thinking in the form of an xmas card.  Only thing is we opened a lot of the stuff on the drive back from the venue and then we had to scramble to get ready for Mexico.  We haven't forgotten what everyone had gotten us... there wasn't a ton of actual gifts or gift certificates... but it wasn't organized and some of it has escaped memory. 

Celtic Swirl

I'm getting married this month.  17 days in fact.  That's pretty cool.

There's been a terrible amount of stress, wedding related and a lot of non-wedding-related.

We have bedbugs.  The phobia that doesn't generally affect me day to day has flared up like mad - I wake up from a sound sleep thinking there's bugs on me, I turn the light on and assure myself it's ok.  Well, they're there and when they're not there I have phantom bites.  This item makes everything 100x shittier above everything else.  And here I thought we'd be bringing bedbugs back from Mexico, but we'll be bringing them to Mexico.

Looking for a new place to live.  We have a viewing tonight and tomorrow.  We'll likely move in October; we haven't given notice yet.

Wedding party problems - everyone knows everyone so I'm not delving in too deep, but choices were made that shouldn't have been made in a couple matters.  So. Much. Unnecessary. Crazy. Ass. Drama.

Family ambushing - at the wedding shower in Peterborough my mom and nan both asked me to invite a family member I hadn't.  When I refused my nan started dialing the number of one uncle saying that I had to tell him no.  woh nelly.  That was all resolved, but still.  Thanks fam.

That's basically it.

Looking forward to our adventure in the Yucatan, looking forward to August 20th.  Hardly any time at all left.

Grand To Do List Before the Wedding
  • Deal with problem concerning me and family member through counseling, self reflection and finally directly with family member
  • Maintain weight or lose 10 lbs - not to gain anything beyond 165lbs
  • Make several types of bread, not only the no-knead variety - specifically rye, pumpernickel and gluten free
  • Continue to sell baked goods, even if it ends up being a couple loaves of bread here and there
  • Keep volunteering at Auntie Loo's to make connections and learn
  • Start meditating
  • Research newly-wed counseling - never hurts.
  • Start a pen-pal relationship with my 13 year old niece

I'm sure there's more... but it's hard to keep track of everything

Feb 25
  • Quit Auntie Loo's due to a number of reasons, major one being that the bakers at my level make only minimum wage and I always felt a little odd volunteering my time for their profit.  Really disheartened on the whole baking gig.  Cannot make minimum wage.
  • There's occasionally sold baked goods, I never really expected it to continue much after xmas
  • The weight thing is going well, lost around 10 lbs in January and now my pants fit again, huzzah!
  • Family issue is better with time for me although I don't want to see that family member in a group setting if I can help it
  • Not sure if the pen-pal thing is going to happen, but I have began to be more involved with her on facebook and I gave her a fantasy novel which she devoured (which was super cool to hear)
  • Need to work on the other shtuff

upa upa upadate
Having housing dreams of moving into one of  these co-op townhouses


Bruyere, Lebretton, Loretta, Rochester, Ron Kolbus Place or Spadina. Any of those would do.  Rochester isn't very nice, but the Ron Kolbus looks *gorgeous*.  We'll only be able to actually view any of these apartments when our name is called up on the list.  The person in charge of the housing says that the list goes pretty fast; there are a lot of properties.  I really am hoping we can move in 2011... but we shall see.

We'd need to buy our own fridge, stove, washer, dryer, but really, you can get those for fair prices.  I'm faxing the application on Monday.

Slightly dreading the 6 hours (total) of driving back and forth to Peterborough for a shower lunch at the Olde Stone Brew Pub with all my Ottawa family and who knows (Kayren does) how many of my PTBO family.  There's going to be family there that I didn't invite to the wedding.  My mom asked me the other night to give an invite to an aunt that I'm "supposedly closest to" who is genuinely going through a hard time; I wouldn't say no, but I could have used the heavy handed suggestion a month or two ago.

Although, you know what?  Having 3 family members heavily suggested that I invite to the wedding has been the only action my mom has taken towards the wedding.  She's going to pay half for the school bus & that is the end of her involvement.  So, really not bad.  Mason and I don't take well to other people trying to twist things the way they want them; we've been open to suggestion, but the vision for the wedding has always been there.  Through months of finaly realizing that we can't just let people do whatever we've taken excruiating steps towards telling people what to do finally... which should have been done in the first place.  It would have saved us a lot of pain.  There's still small items that people are trying to be individual with, but they'll be worked out... and the wedding day will be what it will be.  Awesome!

I ordered this necklace from etsy and had the lady use ivory pearls

and it was stolen from inside the apartment building (past the locked door).  Mason found the opened package.  So So So not cool.  Isn't pretty though?  That broach is just... anyways.  I contacted CA Post, the matter has been escalated and I'm hoping to get my money back.  Postman shouldn't have put the package on the stairs like that.  It should have been returned and a notice put up saying I have a package.  SO if I get my money back I'm going to order this beauty

Which will probably stab my neck, but isn't just gorgeous?  I'd get it in ivory too.

OH I am *loving* my new job.  I've already gotten notice from one of the partners I assist that I'm doing an excellent job and she let my admin manager know.  All hail the big corp!  Eff yes.  Show up, do your work, stay forever, heh.  I'm not used to having positive reinforcement at my jobs... Ottawa Magazine didn't treat me very well.  My new company has good mat leave too I guess.


Mason and I want to add to our cat collection with one of these little beauties

Tonkinese kitty.  We'd have to get him from a breeder, so likely a kitten... which I'm ok with.  I don't want my cats dying all at the same time so a bit of an age gap will be ok.  Shadow-Cat is just passed 7, Ace is probably 5.  Kittens are bloody nuts (I've had Shadow since being a kitten and he's just a twisted little cat now).

Hair update:
I'm still on the path of not washing my hair, although I've decided to shampoo it once a week.  I have it down more than I did before; it really does behave a lot more well.  Still need to brush it more often though.

My hair at my wedding hair trial!!!  It's kinda like celtic knots.  It will go very well with my 50s-ish dress.

Hair Vanity/New Job
Day 14 of the Hair Experiment, aka hair vanity

Washed my hair with conditioner on Day 10 to get the extra oils out.  So far, so good.  I think I'm a convert.  My head is not itchy at all, the scalp lump I have hasn't itched in days (it used to be quite itchy often, but I figured that was just the cutaneous horn coming in...*PUKE*).  I don't need to use hairspray, my hair does not stink, the humidity doesn't affect it as much as it did when I used shampoo, it's not dried out, it curls/waves like crazy when I don't blow dry it.  I do need to brush it more often, but I enjoy the sensation of brushing my hair, which is getting past my shoulders slowly.  The oily texture has very much reduced in the two weeks I've been trying this out.  I touch it and there is still a small bit of residue, but it's not as heavy as it was before.  I can leave it down or keep it up and it's not nearly as frizzy as before.  Basically it's the hair I've been trying to have forever; I just used to spend a ton on product and was never very successful at it getting it the way I wanted it.  Now I hardly have to put any effort into it and the way it looks pleases me. 

My goal is to only wash my hair with conditioner once a month, or I guess, whenever I feel it needs it.

The streaks of white hair are coming in nicely; I still see no grays, just startling whites.  I know Mason wouldn't really like being married to a witch, but I kinda love my whites.  I hope to have all white crazy hair one day, and I've wanted that since I was a teenager.  Not interested in dying my hair, I really like the colour it is... besides, when I did dye my hair it was all browns anyways.  Waste of money trying to get the colour I already have.


I got a new job, a Big Girl Job.  It's a shmancy big corp with oodles of money.  Man, I hope I can deliver.  I'll have never been paid so much, and I don't want to lose that luxury that I've never had before.  I'm not boasting, it's just a plain fact that I've been making so little for the shitty little office jobs I've had for the last 5 years.  Nortel paid well, but the place was depressing, it was a contract and could be terminated at any time, beyond the fact that it had no benefits or vacation/sick leave.

I've bought a few choice adult pieces of clothing, like blazers and lovely blouses that will need ironing.  Big Girl clothes, nice ones though, not the polyester crap you get from Fairweather or Suzy (I'll still shop there, my loves!), but quality items from Winners and Jacob's.  I don't have much room for new clothes, or the clothes we have already.  The apartment is definitely cramped, but we'll make it work.  Our plans of moving flippity flops by the month, but the place is cheap and will let us pay down debts/save money and there's hardly a commute for both of us.  I don't want to own a house yet, not for a while.  I don't want to be that responsible yet, I can be, I just don't want to. There's something about having to do lawn maintenance, hiring a guy to fix your stove that's so much more worse than taking care of a squalling tiny human.  Give me the tiny human, I know how to hug, laugh and teach, but don't make me pick up the phone and give my credit card to some skilled tradesman that will charge me a mint for my ineptitude.

Hair Experiment/ode to hair
Day 5 (6) of no Shampoo
(6) because I used conditioner on Thursday, but 5 days of having no cleaning solutions in my hair except water scalp massage.  My hair is super soft and I have to brush it a lot more to uh, move the oils around.  The hair definitely has a texture to it (it's the oils) that it doesn't have when shampooing, a bit residue-y, as if I've used a lot of product.  It doesn't look bad, when the volume wears out I brush it again and bam it's like I have 40s movie star hair.  I have to do this a couple times a day as where before I only brushed my hair once in the morning. 

(Block out everything but the hair - it's soft like the bouncy curls)

Side note:  I don't know how people in the 40s actually took care of the their hair, but I'm wondering now if using shampoo was a regular practice...

Good ol wikipedia - the word shampoo is derived from the Hindi word chāmpo - head massage.  Modern shampoo as we know it was introduced in the 1930s.

"Theory:  Shampoo has only been used with fervor since the 1970s. Before then, either regular soap was used a few times a month or, just after the early 20th century, shampoo was used only a few times a year. It was in the 1970s that shampoo use became prevalent. Ads featuring Farrah Fawcett and Christie Brinkley asserted that it was unhealthy not to shampoo several times a week. This mindset is reinforced by the greasy feeling of the scalp after a day or two of not shampooing. Using shampoo every day removes sebum, the oil produced by the scalp. This causes the sebaceous glands to produce oil at a higher rate, to compensate for what is lost during shampooing. According to some dermatologists, a gradual reduction in shampoo use will cause the sebum glands to produce at a slower rate, resulting in less grease in the scalp."

Side Note 2:  So it's very possible the girl in the above photo hadn't had her hair washed in a while, maybe weeks!  Very interesting indeed.

Mason's not washing his hair as well; really didn't expect him to get on the no-wash train.  He generally has to use product to get his hair the way he likes, but now it just behaves and he doesn't have to use anything. 

I've only used the hair flattener once and that was the first day where I thought it had no bounce or life to the hair.  Until my scalp stops over-producing oils I don't think it's wise to use the flattener otherwise from my bangs.

I'm going to wash my hair with conditioner Friday and start the cycle again.  Yay to no more shampoo?  No more dry brittle hair?!

I'm still not 100% I want to keep doing this, but I would like to see the stage where the over-production of oils stop.

Day One of no shampoo...well, technically Day Two since I only used conditioner yesterday, but Day ONE of no hair washing product, just water and scalp massage.  My hair is definitely flatter than normal, easier to straighten, very soft, but by the end of the day it's definitely going to take on that greasy sheen.  It's also lost its natural waviness.  We'll see how this goes, some people swear by not using shampoo or washing their hair once a week with it.  Natural oils kick in and supposedly your hair becomes less brittle.  Cavemen didn't have nasty hair and they only had soap root sometimes, depending where they were (thank you Jean Auel for filling my head with sexy Cro-Magnon man imagery).

My biggest hobby these days is reading the Fire & Ice series.  I actually BOUGHT (I never buy books unless I loooooooove them) as much as the series as I could last week (Chapters is having a great paperback sale on it right now - $30 for 4 hefty books).  The first chapter of 'The Clash of Kings' was the most slogging of the chapters so far, but I'm in it and good gods I can't book these books down.

I haven't smoked weed since camping on the long weekend.  It's almost like I smoked myself scared or something.  Nothing happened, but my want/need/crave whatever is just not there.  I've said no when offered.  This hasn't happened since highschool when I just said NO to all drugs (I was very much an advocate of the just say no era, but then university happened).  Yeah, it's been 3 weeks and I have a ton of weed in the house and many different ways to smoke it, just really, not interested.  Weird.

Wine, on the otherhand, is still very much loved.  The wine we bottled for the wedding in January hasn't been tested in a couple weeks, if not a month, maybe I'll crack another one tonight.  It'll supposedly blossom to it's maximum tastiness in another month or so.  The white tastes pretty good, but the red, it might even take longer for me to really like it.  It's definitely potable, but not heavy enough for my ooh la la liking.

I made Italian cheesecake for the first time last night.  $17 in ingredients (that's a lot).  Above all cakes and pies cheesecake is my most favourite dessert, hands down.  Italian cheesecake is made with ricotta cheese and has matzo meal (or ground up branflakes - use what you have - to soak up the moisture of the ricotta), the bottom crust is sugared breadcrumbs and is only there to remove the cake from the pan, not really for taste (unlike other cheesecakes where the crust is ground up graham crackers or oreo cookie for a chocolate cheesecake - YUM!).  It's crumbly, delightfully rich and delicious.  I had a small sliver for breakfast this morning - heaven!  It's Mason's favourite type of cheesecake as well.

For a while there I really thought I was going to switch careers, go to school for baking and become a semi-pro baker.  This dream filled my every waking moment and fueled me in all my baking projects.  Then I got engaged and money that I would be putting aside for school needed to be put aside for the wedding.  I then looked into how much a person with the level of talent I have would make and that was really the end of it.  New dreams, new exceptions, new wanderings.  There will always be more dreams.

Damn You Twitter
Twitter:  The thing I miss about twitter is reading specific people's tweets.  I had a glass of wine on Friday night and Mason hadn't gotten home yet, so what does Kristin do when this happens generally?  She sits on Twitter and responds to everything (oooh habits).  I scanned Twitter to see if I had missed anything for the day (I got bored and only looked at Friday's instead of up to Tuesday when I stopped) and, I hadn't missed anything.  Well, maybe I did, I don't know, I stopped looking when it felt like I hadn't missed anything.  It's much better for my work to not look at Twitter every 20 minutes and it's much better for me mentally-health-wise to stop the needless chatter from other people.

Beyond Friday evening for 5 minutes I haven't looked at Twitter since Tuesday.  I think about it checking it often (out of habit) but I'm happy with what I'm doing.  What I'll likely end up doing is checking specific people's feeds and seeing what they said while at home when bored/alone.

Sure, I can tweet about how I'm not doing bluesfest volunteering this year and it makes me sad, but it's the most responsible choice for wedding-sanity,  I could tweet about how I'm currently icing my hand since I slammed it into a railing going up the stairs carrying heavy boxes at work... but I don't need the sympathy of the twitterverse, and really, who cares?  I told Mason about hurting myself and I said on FB that I wasn't doing bluesfest just so that really Leslie would know (we were going to volunteer together, but I also just wrote her an email, so saying it on FB was useless because she probably won't even see it there).

I've made more than one post about how I feel about the Internet, how I used/use it.  For the last 11 years I've been using LJ and other Internet sites for basically all the same reason - are there other people like me out there?  I know the answer (yes, a million).  I'm no snowflake.  Twitter just took too much of my time (especially at work) so... I needed to tidy that up, get responsible, do what Kristin needs to do, Carry On.

BatShit Crazy
This wedding is turning me into a nut job.  Every single decision I make matters.  Why does it matter?  In the end I'm not terribly certain... many decisions that have to be made are things I generally do.not.care.about. but they matter.  I've become an over-sensitive, snappy weirdo that has nothing but wedding on the brain.  I don't like this, there's days that I wake up with a heaviness on my head because things just haven't come together yet, or I feel like I've offended people with my wishes.

When the days come for the bachelorette party and the wedding itself everything that's been done will be done and nothing can be done about it.  I'm really looking forward to those days.  The time leading up to those days can be excruciating with the amount of planning and preparation and wild attempts at forethought.  I'm not even having a gigantic wedding, but it's the biggest party that had anything directly to do with me and loved ones I've ever put on.  I have enough problems planning my own birthday party.

If I had the ability to make one wish from that fairyweddinggodmother woman from TLC it would be for my mom and nan to live in the city for the next three months (or forever).  I don't think they would actually help a terrible amount for wedding planning (it's just not their thing) but they would be here when it mattered most.

Yes.  Looking terribly forward to camping this weekend where beyond the time that I am driving stone cold sober (obviously!!) I will be delightfully out of commission.  I don't want to talk about wedding, not one word.  Not a peep.  Not a sliver of a thought.

If and when I am ever in a wedding party as bridesmaid or matron/maid of honour having my own wedding will have made me a very good support  - especially when the bride needs to bitch about how hard it's turned out to be... unexpectedly.  I didn't think it would be this mentally challenging, but yup... it is. Talking with Alex the other night helped soooo much.

OH and to top it off I've been having baby dreams a lot more frequently.  The newest one I had involved me and Mason plus a 6 month old baby named Reilly and we were at a party (I was sober) and it was stormy.  The baby was pretty chill and so so so cute in it's striped onesie. Really the dream was quite boring, except that we had a baby and were it's parents and were at a party.

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